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Seven Sensual Ways to Improve Your Sex Life

By Dr E. C. Gordon

When you have been in a relationship for years or even decades, your sex life often becomes something of a routine. Once you have learned about the things that your partner enjoys, it is tempting to just repeat these specific acts. After all, they are successful, and trying new things comes with the possibility of failure. However, once sex becomes predictable then it starts to become merely pleasant as opposed to passionate, and from there it can easily become boring. In addition, couples often become rather lazy about sex as the years wear on, all but eliminating foreplay or allowing it to turn into a cursory process. Read on to learn about seven ways to add some sensuality to your sex life and improve your relationship in the process.

1) Make foreplay last much longer:
A lot of couples will simply kiss for a few minutes before moving on to intercourse, or pay lip service to the idea of foreplay by briefly caressing each other before getting undressed. However, if you do this then you are missing out on a lot of intimacy and on the chance to make the sex itself more intense. Firstly, sex without foreplay can be quite impersonal and can sometime makes one or both of you feel somewhat ‘used’. On the other hand, taking the time to really explore your partner’s body with your hands and mouth will make them feel strongly desired, and being treated this way in return will create the same feelings in you. Secondly, if foreplay is drawn out then the anticipation will make you both much more lustful. This is likely to make you much more enthusiastic when you eventually make love, and equally likely to increase the level of satisfaction that you feel at the end of the night.

2) Experiment with using a blindfold:
When you are blindfolded, all of your other senses are heightened. This means that you are likely to experience more sexual pleasure. In addition, you will enjoy the excitement of wondering when and where your partner’s next touch will come. Wearing a blindfold during foreplay or sex is also a great way to cautiously experiment with being submissive to you partner, and the lack of control that you have over the situation can be thrilling. Next time, trade places and be the one to blindfold your partner.

3) Learn how to give each other a thorough massage:
A massage creates deep relaxation and the sort of intimacy that leads to better lovemaking. If you have the time and the interest, you could take a short massage course in order to learn how to expertly relieve tension in your partner. Alternatively, you might just want to shop for a smooth and pleasantly scented massage oil. Some of these oils are designed for foreplay and will be specially scented in a way that enhances sensuality. In addition, some flavored sexual lubricants double as massage oils, so you can combine massage with some more substantial foreplay.

4) Try abstaining from sex for a while:
Talk to your partner and agree on a length of time during which you will not make love at all. During this period, enjoy all of the forms of physical intimacy that young lovers tend to experience before they decide to have sex. When intercourse is not an option, you will work harder to please each other in all of these ways. When you finally return to having sex, you will hopefully hold on to all that you have learned and decide to incorporate it into fun and sensual foreplay.

5) Take a bath together:
Before you even get down to real foreplay, consider going for a hot bath together. The image of a couple in a bubble bath gently lit by candles may sound like a tired cliché, but the experience can be both relaxing and highly intimate. You might try surprising your partner with a bubble bath after work, and you could share a bottle of wine or some favourite chocolate while you bathe. After the bath, you will probably find that you are in the ideal mood for slow, sensual sex.

6) Have sex somewhere new:
In addition to approaching sex somewhat differently, you might want to start thinking about where you have it. A new location will help to spark new behaviours and encourage you to try new positions. If you always make love in bed, try moving to the shower or the sofa. If you have an entirely private yard, have sex outside in the summer.

7) Pick out lingerie together:
If you are female, encourage your partner to go shopping with you so that you can get some help and input when picking out sexy new bras and underwear. If your partner is female, go shopping and pick out a surprise (or find a few potential gifts online and let her choose which ones she likes best).

If you keep these seven tips in mind and work to include at least half of them in the way that you approach sex with your partner, your sex life will become more sensual and less predictable. You may also want to explore some more adventurous amendments to your sex life, but you should first start with the basics by working to create a greater degree of intimacy and a larger amount of sexual chemistry.